Dear Oklahoma, – The Daily Texan

Dear Oklahoma,

How does it feel to be the SEC's disappointing newcomer this year? They have already lost to the “fake UT”, now it is time for the “real UT” to achieve their victory. There's a reason the game is played at the Texas State Fair every year, and even though it's called Red River, it looks pretty orange. I heard Norman is a great place, which is why everyone would rather come to Dallas for this game. The Longhorns are the last undefeated team in the SEC and don't expect that streak to end any time soon.

For heaven's sake, your coach had to bench your own starting quarterback under the pressure of SEC competition, which is for the best since he would have looked ridiculous against Texas. It's much better for the entire team to embarrass themselves than to blame just one person, am I right? Texas is the #1 college football program in the country – the last time Oklahoma was #1 in Red River was when the Twilight Saga was released…so Bella…where the hell have you been?? ?

I have a joke. Why do people from Texas say “Y’all”? That's because we left out the two least important letters: OU.

While the Sooners were busy making T-shirts and getting Longhorn logos tattooed on their bodies, Texas was building the No. 1 team in the country. Don't act like we've forgotten what happened after Stutsman focused more on social media gloating than on the gridiron. How did it feel to lose to Kansas' replacement two weeks later? Does Ollie Gordon II still give you nightmares in your last Bedlam match? Remember when Jackson Arnold threw three picks in a bowl game and you still ran Dillon Gabriel out of town?

Texas fans remember all of this, so they know where you stand. Arnold isn't even good enough to start the offense with the 69th-best scoring base in the country, and you lost to a guy who brought you your last national championship 24 years ago. Somehow, Casey Thompson was alive for this game. Heupel dominated the first three quarters so much that he had to tell his redshirt freshman quarterback to slow down, perhaps because he knew the Sooners' home crowd couldn't handle such a bad hit.

Don't worry, Steve Sarkisian isn't known for taking his foot off the gas. Does 49-0 ring a bell? Enjoy that Golden Hat for two more days, because the remainder of the six-year, $51.6 million contract you gave the 2020 version of Gary Gibbs isn't going any further north.